When we are asked for favors, sometimes we feel an obligation to always say “yes”. This can go to the extreme and we may feel used by others when they take advantage of our own need to be liked and appreciated. We may have created a situation where we feel trapped by our own lack of confidence to say “no” when we need to. It becomes a burden to say yes all the time but we are more worried about what others will think. We don’t want to feel discounted or unappreciated. But how to break free of this way of thinking? Once we realize that this thinking is frustrating, non-productive, and will never give us what we need, we can eliminate this destructive pattern of thinking. If we give up and throw away all the fake yes and no’s, we will have real wisdom that is not shaken by the need for constant affirmation from others.
A complete solution is to let go of our false self that says yes when we really mean no. Only then, our true self will lead us to the security and self-confidence we seek in our relationship with others.